sg.news.yahoo.com/rtrs/20091222/tap-exhibitions-egypt-c3bb44c.html

I am yours,
You are mine,
Of this we are certain.
You are lodged
in my heart,
the small key is lost.
You must stay there
forever.

1. Strangers who do not know the meaning of personal space.

2. People who put on their high beam lights when they dont have to.

3. People who spit in public.

4. Girls who uses their shimmer pink eyeshadow as their blusher and lipstick.

5. Body odour.

6. Lady Gaga's music.

7. Teenagers.

8. PeOpLE WhO tYpe LyK DiS.

9. Ugly posters.

10. 10 different types of typography in a poster that just DONT compliment each other.

11. Too much BLACKLETTER.

12. My next door neighbour when he is drunk.

13. P**** ( i really cant write this in public. well i dont HATE all of them. just the slutty ones. HAHAHA! Shilo will know who... hint... OIL BLOTTERS)

14. Ugly toenails.

15. Nails with dirt in them.

16. Horizontally challenged people who think they are all high and mighty cuz they have huge boobs and laugh at other ppl for their lack of it. EARTH TO PUDGY!

17. Straight boys that enjoy wearing girls clothings but is offended when u call them gay.

18. Fucked up grid system and layout.

19. People who ask me how i shower with my dreads.

20. People that state the obvious. eg. Dreadlocks! (sing some reggae music) or METAL!!!! WARGH (try to gore in a stupid pathetic manner). ermmm u know, u r like a child who just learnt how to pronounce and named the things that he sees. Maybe i should go ard and scream Mats/Minahs/Pakcik Security to ur face? perhaps? yeah?

i sorta miss long dreads...... how long do i have to wait for it to growwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww *whine*

til belly button like last time. :D

today theres many things juggling in my head but all i wanna do is stay in bed for the whole day.

i think its true that i have a ahpui in me. a walk from home to the mrt station left me panting like i just did a marathon. the ahpui must be dragging me. or im just unhealthy.

i woke up today with a sick feeling in my stomach. i had a weird dream of taking pills, showering in fear, huge blue roses, dead bodies, rotting flesh and suicide. oh yes and vomiting.

i feel so sick.................................................................................

of all the things that they sell in the market these days. why dont they have happiness in a bottle? really.
i bet it wld sell like hot cakes cuz everyone is miserable and lonely. dont forget dead in the inside.

right now im fighting the urge to cry like a freaking child. but as usual i wont let it out cuz i dunno. im just like that. i feel like im missing something, like a gaping hole in me that needs to be filled with someone. and we all know who that someone is. and u cant get him on the ads.

i know it is inevitable, and impossible. But i just hate to argue with u over the stupidest things. i can guarantee u a hundred million percent that i want EXACTLY what u want. and i need you to UNDERSTAND that and get it in ur head.

im starting my own black book again. just so i feel like i still am creative.

i guess thats why we constantly consume on products that we dont even need.
we decorate ourselves with diamonds and pearls, huge cars and the works.
trophy wife/husband/children. so that we are complete.

(of course there are some people i know, who make use of friends when they are alone. and after they got themselves someone to fuck with, they forgot about their friends)

so that we can achieve perfection.
but what is perfection? and no matter how much u take and keep on taking. Nothing will ever satisfy u and u just want more and more and more. nothing cld satiate the hunger of consumerism.

i did advertising in school for 6 mths, and i had to create ads to make the society want to buy whatever product im advertising. i have to make u NEED it and
WANT it badly u cant sleep at night, and when u have it, it still wont complete or satisfy u. so we had to study the consumers' minds and take advantage of their "weaknesses". mainly, sex. the most successful form of mindless advertising is sex. sex sells.

like put sum skinny bitch (who was never fat to begin with) in a diet ad or slimming ad. and girls went "oohhh i can be like that" guys go " i want my gf to be as hot as that". eat it up. u missed the whole point. its not about being beautiful and skinny its about being healthy. im not trying to sound so righteous tho. im not any better. i do consume too. of course! i need more cds more shirts more dresses more makeup more food. when in a way they are all the same as the other one.

i did this in school, the next time u go out to see ur friends or to work. count how many ads u find. from the minute u step out of the house to wherever ur heading. just count how many there is.

i cant do anything right cant i?

propelling out of control arent i?

every man and woman is a star.

dead.

but shining.

they just dont know that they are already dead.

kinda like us.

dead in the inside

i came into conclusion that i cannot consume food outside gaming place. I have a very sensitive stomach, and the food that i have been consuming over there is giving me diarrhea. and diarrhea makes u tired and weak. i need to get the toxins out of my system asap.

its been raining for three days. i have to bring a back pack today... i really really need a ciggie

yeah

about now u noticed i love to fill my journal with obscenities.

i am having trouble with the bad emotions. calming self down. i am so irritable this week. ok at least i dont lash out at everyone. i need a scapegoat. wait i mean a punching bag. but i have wimpy arms. i have zero tolerance for anyone on the street. and the fucked up part is i have to keep it all inside. clenched my fist tighten my jaws and move on.

might result in heart attack.

maybe wld even die from that.

fuck me

dexter season finale is so sedih!!! so poor thing he is and the baby. im not sure how he will react after that and if he cld take care of the kiddies. damn

aku bukan nak cam jadi cam sial lah. benda kecik ah. but it made me realy upset. and i dun like to be upset.

well who the fuck does kan. but siallah.... bingit giler ape. pukimak betul. tak klakar sial. boleh solve ke? nak slve aku kena keluar duit. puki dgr2 rumah aku chop duit. aku tgh nak save duit now kena keluar duit untuk benda2 hamblau camni. pukilah.

FUCK LAH

fucking bad day sial

fuck it all

i hate feel so far away...